a_time_slip | The Leauge Of Fail

Entry tags:

julian,
rp

The Leauge Of Fail

Janie had been back for a few days now, but was nervous about Snake Steele showing up again. She had weapons but feared she wouldn't be fast enough.

His attack came as a complete surprise, and one of her fears came true. All of the bad guys were working together, which would make winning a lot harder. Today, she was at a mostly empty diner, drowning her sorrows in a plate of pie and a glass of chocolate milkshake.

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"Yes." she said quietly "For normal people... It's got to at least hurt them, doesn't it?"

After another quiet moment, she spoke again. "It packs a lot of power... don't point it at anything you don't want destroyed."

Julian nodded, still thoughtfully looking at the weapon. "I won't."

He was silent for a moment and then looked up, adding in a low voice: "Good. Of those four, Snake probably is what's closest to a 'normal' guy. I missed one chance to kill him. I won't miss another one."

"Giovan should be normal, but he's not. I thought he was dead..." She looked ashamed for a moment, Janie blamed herself that he was still around and able to hurt her friends. "I'll kill him again when I get the chance... and I'll see what I can do about getting rid of those other two."

Julian knew that way of thinking all to well, and despite having the same thoughts about Snake still being around, he felt it was wrong.

"It's not your fault", he said, looking directly at Janie. "It's his. Theirs. What they have done, what they are doing, it's been their choice, not ours. "

She looked directly at Julian, and tried to believe him."Their choice, right."

He sighed and looked at his hands again, he wasn't sure if he could believe himself.

"I know that it feels differently."

"Honestly, it feels like my fault. If I'd just done what Giovan wanted, he'd be back on Kaldoa and you would be one enemy shorter. I appreciate what you're doing, to make me feel better. Thank you. I wish I could do the same for you."

"Don't worry about me. One more or less, what's the difference?"

He looked up again.
"I didn't just say it to make you feel better, but because I mean it. Do you think that doing whatever Giovan wants is a guarantee he'll stop? Really?"

"You're my friend." she admitted to him "I don't have many of those, and even less that I know will be around for a while. You're all... I can't lose you"

She thought for a minute about what Julian said about Giovan. "No. He likes causing trouble and pain to others."

Julian actually managed to smile briefly when hearing Janie's words. But he also knew the constant worry about people close to him all too well.
"I'm afraid that's what happens when people like us have friends. But really, don't worry. I'm not that easy to kill."

Regarding Giovan, he added: "And that's what I meant. People like him, they enjoy what they're doing. Agreeing to their terms will just encourage them to go on."

"I've got to have friends" she said "I can't go through all of this time alone."

He nodded slowly.

"Yeah. And I don't want people like Giovan or Snake stop us from having friends. It's just ..."

He shrugged, unsure how to continue. How could he say that when he was just about to let it happen again himself?

"I know." she said, picking at her pie "I let them control too much. I shouldn't be afraid to let people know about my family and friends. It's like they're holding us prisoner."

"They are. And no, you shouldn't. But in my experience that's the only thing that can keep them safe. Always being careful."

Looking away, he added: "And sometimes not even that is enough."

"If it's not enough... why bother? Where are you staying, Julian? I'll bring more things over for you later."

"I'm convinced it would have ended worse if I hadn't been careful. But it still hasn't saved everyone."

He hesitated answering Janie's question, just out of habit. But if he didn't trust his friends, who else could he trust? So he told her the address of the old house he was living in.
"What sort of things?"

"What did he do?" she asked. She hadn't talked about what happened with her team since Phoenix came to see her when in med bay.

"Grenades, another energy weapon... um, do you have a teleport?" She'd lie on the paperwork since Julian wasn't actually authorized to have some of the things.

"He killed five people in the bar I worked at to get some information from me." He tried to state it matter-of-factly, like something in the news, but it was obvious that he was still stirred up.

Thinking about practical stuff was much easier. "Weapons, that's good. Thank you. And yeah. Phoenix gave me a teleport that can get me to Kaldoa."

"That's terrible. I'm so sorry that you..." She trailed off, and started to get lost in her thoughts, imagining what happened to her friend

"Don't. I mean ... I put them in danger", he murmured, studying his hands once more because he couldn't bear looking at Janie.

"Did he come to you as well?"

"You couldn't have known." She said.

"Yes. He... killed my team. There were twelve." She wanted to cry, but bit her lip instead. Losing her team would stick with her for a long time.

He shook his head, convinced that he could have known, if it hadn't been Solus, it had been Snake. He didn't say it, though, disturbed by the fact that something similar had happened to his friend.

"Oh ... oh, no. I'm sorry, Janie." He stopped, lacking the proper words.

She didn't have any words either, and instead, looked down at the table and wiped a tear away. Janie couldn't tell her friend it would be better, and that's what she wanted to do.

Julian was silent for a moment, because these were his thoughts, too.
Instead of saying anything, he leaned forward and briefly touched Janie's arm. A little awkward, because he wasn't good at all with physical contact.

"Thank you." she said, giving him a hint of a smile. The small gesture meant a lot to her. "I don't usually... get so upset"

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