Um...

[a_time_slip]

This is a lot of planning. What about finding an officiant to do this when we're ready to marry, because I have no confidence in my wedding planning abilities at all. Having a wedding would be nice and I want one... but this is a lot of planning, and I don't know who would be in the party, I can't contribute to the costs, I've got no dowry- wait, that's not used anymore.

I think all of this is starting to hit me. I'm getting married, I'm moving, I'm going to school, this stuff with my 'family', I'm going to be a stepmother. If this all fails... No. I'll forget about that for now.

9-12 months before the wedding:

*Announce your engagement to friends and family. 
* Arrange for parents to get together and meet each other if they haven't already.
* Pick a special date to begin your lives together. May 25.
* Discuss what your budget will be and who'll be contributing what to the event.  I can't, unless I get a job (which I will when we're in Texas)
* Interview wedding planners if you're using one.  Not trusting anyone else to plan this if we do this wedding thing.
* Pick the ceremony site and meet with the officiant.  Um, haven't done that yet.
* Work on the guest list to get a rough head count.  5?  Is that even a wedding?
* Visit reception sites and reserve one.  I?? Um.  I haven't yet.
* Begin shopping for your wedding gown.  Does looking online count?
* If you want to drop a few pounds for the wedding start now.  ???  I have to lose weight?

6-9 months before the wedding:

*Choose the members of your wedding party.  But those are my guests...
*Select a caterer.  Bring your own lunch?  Okay...  um, I'll need to research this more.
*Enroll in a bridal registry.  I'm not sure about this.
*Order your wedding gown. Once I pick one out and get the money for it.
*Shop for bridesmaids dresses.  ...I have to buy those too?
*Pick a photographer and videographer.  No.  I don't want my picture taken.
*Hire a florist.  This is already adding up to too much
*Start thinking about where you'd like to go for your honeymoon.  Somewhere quiet and relaxing.
*Send out save-the-date cards, especially if your wedding is on a holiday weekend.  This list is discouraging.

4-6 months before the wedding:

*Order wedding stationary (place cards, thank you cards, etc.).  I understand thank you cards, but I don't care where people sit...  well, no.  Phoenix can't sit with us, and Mother can't sit near Daddy
*Shop for the perfect wedding cake.  Mmm, cake
*Hire your wedding-day transportation (carriage, limousine, etc.)  We can't use Ian's car?
*Book your favorite hair stylist and makeup artist. Done!  It's me!
*Check on hotels for any out-of-town guests.   I don't think that'll be a concern?
*Finalize the guest list.  All 5 of the people on it.
*Get definite plans for your honeymoon, make airline and hotel arrangements.  We'll cross this bridge when we get to it
*Plan the rehearsal dinner.  Mmm, dinner.

2-4 months before the wedding:

* Purchase the marriage license from your cities county clerk.  Everything has a price.
* Order tuxedos for the groom and groomsmen.   He already has a tux.
* Meet with the caterer to go over menus, wine selections, etc. A glass of wine would be good right now.
* Order the wedding cake.  Again, torturing me with the cake!
* Select wedding ceremony and reception music.  That will be easy.
* If you plan on writing your own vows start writing them now.  Um.  If I can write a set of equations I will.

4-8 weeks before the wedding:

*Mail wedding invitations 6 to 8 weeks ahead of your wedding date.  That's actually simple
*Do a hair and make up run through with your wedding veil on.  Why?

2-4 weeks before the wedding:

*Work on the seating arrangements for the reception.  IMPORTANT STEP!
*Confirm details with the photographer, florist, and other vendors.  They shouldn't need confirming.
*Have your final wedding dress fitting.  It needs to be fitted?  Fine.
*Write your rehearsal-dinner toast.  Can this be an equation too?
*Purchase gifts for the wedding attendants.  They need gifts?  No idea what to get them.
*Compile a list of all of the wedding vendors and wedding party. Carry this list with you everywhere you go just in case.  Obviously.

1 week before the wedding:

*Place any amounts due on the wedding day in envelopes for easy distribution.  Obviously.
*Give the caterer a final head count.  Another obvious thing.
*Find a trustworthy person to take the cake knife, toasting glasses, etc. to the reception.  That person is on the guestlist/wedding party
*Get final beauty treatments (manicure, facial, massage, waxing, brow shaping, etc.).  Um... I don't do those things.
*Pack for the honeymoon.  Common sense.


The day before the wedding:

*Get something old - symbolizes continuity with the bride's family and the past.  Done.
* Get something new - means optimism and hope for the bride's new life ahead  Done.
* Get something borrowed - an item from a happily married friend or family member, whose good fortune in marriage is supposed to carry over to the new bride. Thanks, John.
* Get something blue - to symbolize love, modesty, and fidelity.  Done.
* And a silver sixpence in her shoe - represents wealth and financial security. For optimum fortune, the sixpence should be in the left shoe. These days, a dime or a copper penny can be substituted.  Thanks Phoenix.

The day of the wedding:

*Relax and remain calm.  HAHAHAHAHA
*Remember to eat something. You may be so busy with things that you forget.  I doubt I'll remember this list
*Allow yourself at least two hours to get dressed.  Why so long?
*Enjoy yourself at this once in a life time event!  If I'm not freaking out.

Summary = (Freaking out) X (Wedding planning list) / promise of food and drink = Pessimistic Janie.

What if this doesn't happen?  Something is going to go wrong.  Something terrible.  I can't take it if that happens.  I don't know what to do.

Comments

[a-mind-flip.livejournal.com]

I guess I must have blinders on, John. I can't think of when he's only cared about himself around me.

[jp-hammond.livejournal.com]

That is because you are one of those few things he puts before his own ego.

[a-mind-flip.livejournal.com]

He's been like that since we first met. He helped me with an equation and bought me dinner.

[jp-hammond.livejournal.com]

He bought you dinner the first day you met?

[a-mind-flip.livejournal.com]

Yes. Mexican food. We talked for hours.

[jp-hammond.livejournal.com]

You must have made an impression on him.

[a-mind-flip.livejournal.com]

I'm not sure how I managed to do that, but I'm glad that I did. I'm very happy with him.

[jp-hammond.livejournal.com]

I could probably make an educated guess how you managed. You both seem very happy since you've been together.

[a-mind-flip.livejournal.com]

How? It was only a math problem.

[jp-hammond.livejournal.com]

Intelligence, you're physically his type, the attention and you obviously liked his company and he, yours.

[a-mind-flip.livejournal.com]

That makes sense. I think you're right, John,

[jp-hammond.livejournal.com]

I also know because of the demands he started making not long after the two of you met.

[a-mind-flip.livejournal.com]

I know about the apartment, and him asking me to go to Sorna with him. I think he was going to ask about the jet after he moved to Texas, but there's no need for that anymore.

[jp-hammond.livejournal.com]

He has asked far more than he has told you. Don't worry. Nothing he has asked for has been out of the limits which I would otherwise do.

[a-mind-flip.livejournal.com]

I wouldn't want him to go out of those limits.

[jp-hammond.livejournal.com]

You have a lot to learn about Dr. Malcolm. Limits rarely enter his consideration for most decisions.

[a-mind-flip.livejournal.com]

I'm learning that.

[jp-hammond.livejournal.com]

As an employer that is a very difficult personality to accommodate.

[a-mind-flip.livejournal.com]

Yes. It would be.

[jp-hammond.livejournal.com]

Sometimes I don't know how I've managed all these years.

[a-mind-flip.livejournal.com]

I'm sure part of it is that he is good at his work.

[jp-hammond.livejournal.com]

His expertise is unquestionable though I refrain from mentioning it whenever possible.

[a-mind-flip.livejournal.com]

Why not?

[jp-hammond.livejournal.com]

Not everyone is as fond of his ego as you are.

[a-mind-flip.livejournal.com]

That's true.