Coming clean

[a_time_slip]

(This is for NYC Noir, but I don't have the brain power to make this into a proper post...  I'll probably fic it later and post it there)

Sometimes, the past catches up with you when you least expect it, and that's what happened that day at Janie's cheap hotel room.  An Agency vehicle was outside, and she knew what was inside.

So, she ran, and kept running until she realized she was at Phoenix's door.  All Janie could do was knock.

Comments

[ashes-ascended.livejournal.com]

He doesn't know if that makes him feel better or worse. She says she wants to be with Phoenix, but on that basis he's hardly the person to advise her on her current dilemma. The angels' eyes remain on the woman as she moves away.

"Janie, baby. I never judge you. I can't. But I can't... you need to," Phoenix stops and sighs. "You can't stay with someone out of a sense of duty. And that's not because I have a vested interest. I do actually like him, it's just - he's worth more than that."

[a_time_slip]

"I know." she said, not looking at Phoenix "Is there a way to make him forget all about me? I don't want to break the heart of the only decent human in New York. The last woman he was with broke his heart, and I still- I was better off when all I did was work. What good is time and space when I can't do a damn thing about making life better?"

[ashes-ascended.livejournal.com]

"I dunno. I can't go around fucking with the heads of mortals. Besides, that's dear Uncle Vahl's department."

Phoenix gets up too, and paces around the study.

"You have to do what you have to do. I can't help you with this. I'm a fucking mess, Janie. I want to help you more than anything, but ... I don't know what to tell you."

[a_time_slip]

"You can't help me?" asked Janie, in almost a whisper. The lack of options closed in on her as she turned her pin over in her petite hands. "Phoenix... I never meant for for this to happen. I'm sorry. "

She stared at her hands, at the reminder of the past she couldn't run from. "Do you want me to leave right now?"

[ashes-ascended.livejournal.com]

"I would if I knew how." What can he possibly do? Have Vito bumped off? Short of marching up to the man's front door and telling him he's never to speak to Janie again, there's nothing Phoenix can do. And there's the certainly that Vito won't just meekly obey his rival. He'd have to hear if from Janie herself.

"No. I want you to stay. I always want you to stay."

[a_time_slip]

"I'll go back to the agency, and disappear for a bit. Please send Lynn to my father if you need a break"

She tried closing herself off, but her wounds were too deep and too open to do so.

[ashes-ascended.livejournal.com]

"I don't want you to disappear! And I certainly don't want you to go back to the fucking Agency."

Phoenix really doesn't like the way events have turned in regard to this enforced promotion. "What's going on with them? They stand for everything the Kaldoan Offworld Corps does, for fuck's sake. Since when did the Agency start coercing it's members? Staking them out? Hunting them down? 'Cause that's what this fucking sounds like."

[a_time_slip]

"I don't have the courage to dump him!" she says, frustrated.

Janie realizes that she hasn't told Phoenix about what's happened to the Agency yet. She assumed he knew.

"It's falling apart. After Gio disappeared and I filed the formal papers against him, his buddies started going AWOL, then a lot of the superior officers disappeared. Command is a shell of what it once was, and recruitment is way down. We've still got funding but something is wrong with Command, and I'm supposed to join them. I won't, not with who is left. Check with the Offworld Corps, and see when the last time they sent a team out was."

[ashes-ascended.livejournal.com]

"I can't do it for you." He's wondering now, if she deliberately finds insurmountable hurdles just so she doesn't have to face what it would really be like, if the two of them managed to get together.

Phoenix hasn't had much contact with the Agency for some time. Any specific work is passed his way through the Temporal division, and since the war began, the Offworld Corps resources have had to be diverted into that effort.

"I would if I was permitted contact with the homeworld. I'll try and get hold of one of the satellite departments."

[a_time_slip]

"I know that! Look, I'll set up a time and talk to him. Apologize and. Let him know that I want to be with you." The thought of it made her heart cold, because she knew from the beginning that things would never be serious with Vito.

"You don't need to... I doubt any teams have gone out. But I'm not sure what else to do other than return and fight the corruption. I'm broke, Phoenix, without access to my accounts. I've got nothing."

[ashes-ascended.livejournal.com]

"Okay. Look. As much time as you need, okay? Then we're gonna have to take things slowly and carefully." He takes one of her hands. Phoenix feels almost as bad as Janie does about this whole Vito thing. "We're both bruised and hurting, it's never a great idea to go from one guys arms straight into anothers, not without a little healing time."

"I still got my contacts, we'll see what we can find on the Agency. Then maybe we can hack your accounts."

[a_time_slip]

Janie nodded, and clung to Phoenix's hand. "I'm happy in your arms, and I don't know if I can be alone right now."

She was scared, about everything changing, and had no idea of what the future held. She had no idea how Vito would take the news, and briefly wondered if setting him up with someone else was a good idea.

"Thank you... I- you do so much for me, Phoenix."

[ashes-ascended.livejournal.com]

He shifts position, arms around Janie's shoulders. "You don't have to be alone, we just... need to understand how messed up we are. Take things carefully."

He's still too scared to hope, and screwing up someone else's heart never makes this kind of thing any better.

"It's okay. You do so much for me in intangible ways, you don't even know it. And anyway, I'm gonna need your help with Lex. The only way to get him back to his own time is to get into present-day Guln, and travel back from there." Phoenix hates to make such requests of Janie when she's vulnerable like this, but maybe it'll help her feel less useless.

[a_time_slip]

"Will you keep your arms around me?" she asked, wanting so much more at the moment.

Janie still feels terrible for breaking someone's heart, and is just waiting for something terrible to happen to her.

"Guln?" But she nodded, because she'd do anything for Phoenix. "I'll take him... Poor guy. Maybe, before he has to go, I'll take him somewhere nice. Would that be okay?"

[ashes-ascended.livejournal.com]

"I'm not letting go." He reassures her. Very much meaning every word.

"We'll have to see what intel Drake has for us, first. Hopefully the future version of Lex can throw a little light on what we're meant to do. It obviously worked, so we just have to make sure we get things right."

[a_time_slip]

Janie breathed in deeply, trying to make a memory of his scent, of how she felt in his arms and rested her head against Phoenix.

"Let me know, whatever I can do. Please keep me in the loop, Phoenix."

[ashes-ascended.livejournal.com]

She feels so small in his arms, Phoenix gently rubs Janie's back as he holds her. A small comforting motion he tends to employ automatically.

"I will. On both scores. We're in it together, okay?"

[a_time_slip]

That motion tends to calm her fairly quickly, and Janie is now a hundred times more relaxed than she was when she first got to Phoenix's.

"Always..."

[ashes-ascended.livejournal.com]

And it's not as if the universe has decided they should spend an eternity torn apart from each other. At least she's a part of his family. Phoenix strokes Janies hair, reminding himself of that fact.

"If you want to come here, afterwards. You know wherever I am, it's your home too." It's the emotional part he wants to take slowly, Janie's staying here makes sense, especially from the children's point of view.

[a_time_slip]

Janie wonders herself why they haven't ended up together, but knows that looking into it might prove a bit disastrous.

"I've already moved out from his place." she admits. "To a hotel... he said that I didn't have to move, but I couldn't stay there any more."

[ashes-ascended.livejournal.com]

The angel's heart perks up at that, far more than it should do.

"We'd all love to have you here." He plants a kiss on her head. "But I won't pressure you again."

[a_time_slip]

"I'll stay until I get paid again." she said, carefully. She felt too guilty to stay with Vito, which was why she'd packed up and left his apartment. She hadn't been able to break up with him yet, though.

[ashes-ascended.livejournal.com]

"Well, hopefully we can free up your assets some. I know some people who can cover their tracks pretty well. Even from the Agency."

He keeps holding Janie because it feels too good to stop.

[a_time_slip]

"I wish I'd told you sooner." she says, finally. She's not going to let go of Phoenix.